Meditation Articles Series


When Grief Becomes So Overwhelming

19 May 2010

My spiritual mentor has often said that our attachments keep us miserable.  Itís what the Buddha also talked about. 

The loss of someone or something that we were very attached to can cause us overwhelming grief.  At first we feel the loss in every waking moment, and this mourning can go on for a long time.

I can understand how clear a human being can be without attachment.  For most of us on the spiritual path this can take a long time, maybe many lifetimes.  So it is about accepting the attachments, and the grief that follows a great loss. 

There are so many books written to help someone cope with loss. 

What I want to write briefly about is that sometimes it becomes just too overwhelming even to meditate.  The agitation is so pronounced that meditation often becomes an aversion.  Again itís about accepting and allowing what is. If a person has had a regular practice itís essential not berate themselves that they are feeling that they cannot meditate at present. 

At times of loss a personís resilience, physically, mentally and emotionally is challenged.  It becomes one day at a time.  Someone who is grieving needs support.  A lot of self-nurturing is required as the whole psyche undergoes transformation.  A person, in my experience will eventually come back to meditation but may need lots of other ways in the meantime in which to adjust and to heal.  Massage, warm baths with essential oils, time with dear friends and loved ones, perhaps even a change of scenery are some simple ways to adjust to loss, and the emotional upheavals that follow.


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